1. Happy birthday to Me, you’re 25 and freaking out.
2. You’re no longer ‘early twenties’. You’re mid-twenties now, with mid-twenties-crisis: figuring out there are too many things to figure out and have figured out.
3. Welcome to the age when society will torture you with none-of-their-business kind of questions, “When will you get married? You’re a woman, time is ticking, what’s wrong with you, you’re not that ugly? Stop making money, that’s not what you’re born for! Lower your standard!” etc… etc..
4. Change of plans. This age’s goal: education. A man told me this, “It’s about buying freedom. You won’t go far with undergraduate degree.”
5. Change of direction. I used to picture my self as a ‘mompreneur’ in the future. But now I realized that I can’t stand being static. No offense for stay-at-home mommies, it’s my personal ideal and perspective, I just don’t wanna be ordinary. I am fond of knowledge, ideas sharing, meeting smart people and experts, cultures, languages and research. Hence, now I want to jump my self to academic life. I want to be a lecturer, who also runs creative business of course. Art is part of my life. But I also want to see my name on Google search result for articles or journals, not only for online shop. Jenuh Barbie jadi sistah-sistah OL shop…
6. Finally I drive, yeay! Even though with poor (or dangerous, life-threatening) driving skills. Maklum, darah biru.
7. Successfully maintaining having yoghurt everyday and monthly beauty treatment. (My name has “Ayu”—beautiful—in it. I have a reputation to keep. Lol.) Next step: consistent daily work-out.
8. Marriage? That will be my least priority in this age (unless a sudden unavoidable bad thing takes place, then I will think about that). A friend told me, “Why so hurry? You will be married the rest of your life, and you can only be single for a quarter of your life.” True that.
9. Being selfish is not as bad as what your religion teacher taught you it was. One has to put her/ his self first. I cant make people happy if I am not happy. I only live once, not to fulfill other people’s happiness and expectations.
10. Seemingly my exes are going to win the race. Flashback, I was the one who always urged to marriage. I broke up with my first BF with an excuse that I couldn’t wait for his study, I wanted to get married ASAP at that time (yeah I know this is embarrassing). Now he (or they) must be laughing. All I can say is congratulations to you (all), for your almost-game-over! Lol!
11. Focus on trying to get scholarship, the once-forgotten dream (because of stupid marriage thing. Society, please… educate yourself.)
12. Voltaire is now on the list.
13. Living with family is a No-No. A little distance is better.
14. Finally I succeeded convincing my parents that they’ve been wrong all this time. Mom, you should be proud of me and brother. If your kids always agree with you, it means you didn’t provide them enough education. Our rebel is truly your achievement, Mom!
15. Ya ampun, Lebaran is so expensive.
16. Nothing in the malls is as tempting as when you were 23. “Idih bused, risoles gini doang goceng! Kain dipotong-potong aja cepek!”
17. I need more bookshelves.
18. Asset-based thinking.
19. Damn you, taxes!
20. Insecurities?? Never heard that word before.
21. More and more thirst for knowledge.
22. The 90s is awesome. We’re the luckiest. Poor you, Generation Z!
23. Culture and tradition are nice and beautiful, but doesn’t mean I have to follow it or apply that to my life, if that just complicates my life. Such as: ridiculous Indonesian wedding, ‘imprisoned’ heiress, etc.
24. There are some things that I used to practice, I don’t do it anymore. And I am happier. It only took some time to adjust with ‘the loss’.
25. I cant be more thankful for all the things that went out of plans. When I just graduated, I planned to only work for a half year, then resign and get married. But failed. Now I have been working for 2 years, I’ve got the experiences, knowledge and motivation that we don’t get from school, and most important is, I have time to enjoy the financial freedom. I have stories to tell my kids in the future and my work experience has helped to shape my personality and point of view. I love my messed-up plans!